The Lord of the Chamber of Secrets
by Alamdothiel
Summary: Find out what happens when Dumbledore is in fact friends with Gandalf!
1. The Night Before

"Pass me the frogs spawn!" Hermione hissed, "Quick, if anyone finds us then we are in huge trouble"  
  
"Alright, alright, keep your hair on!" Ron hissed back, fighting back the temptation to strangle her.  
  
Harry was reading out the list of ingredients, overseen by Hermione, of course. "What's next?"  
  
"Newts...um...newts... newt's ears. Yes newt's ear, "His glasses were slipping down his face; sweat was forming on his forehead.  
  
"Got them, give the book to me, and then I can finish the spell"  
  
Harry passed the book on to her while quickly scanning the toilets.  
  
"You know I don't have such a good feeling about this, the last time we did a spell in here, you turned into a cat and the Chamber of Secrets was found. Oh yes, I ALMOST GOT KILLED!"  
  
"Nothing bad will happen this time, we've had enough bad luck. One more ear and I am done!" Hermione then began to read out  
  
"Iksi sightsi, rumble umble, Gwaffle Swa...swaflling, I have the power of the fellowship, to power of three, to oversee, to oversee." 


	2. An Unexpected Guest

Harry rolled over to the shadow of a gangrened creature hissing at him.  
  
"My preciousssssssssssssssss." It rasped  
  
"Ghwf?" Harry rolled over to stretch to his glasses, to gain a better vision of what was in front of him.  
  
"Give it to me!" The shadow was wrestling with Harry's blanket.  
  
"Wha? Who are you? Dobby!?"  
  
"Pah. Dobby! Gollum, Gollum!" It spat.  
  
"Gollum?''  
  
Harry realised that today wasn't going to be a normal day at Hogwarts, well actually, when was a day at Hogwarts ever normal?  
  
Ron began to stir, when I stay stir I mean try to stay asleep.  
  
"Ron!" Harry murmured "Ron!"  
  
"I love you Hermione, I love you, lets, uh Harry, HARRY!"  
  
"What the hell are you on about?"  
  
"I was on about nothing, nothing at all!" Ron was now red from his neck up, merging with his hair he stumbled out of bed and into his uniform.  
  
"I had an elf on my bed."  
  
"What, Dobby, I thought he lived down in the kitchens? He wouldn't be able to get in here. You're imaging it. Did you have your glasses on?"  
  
"...No, but I did hear it talk to me."  
  
"Ooh what did it say?!" Ron mocked  
  
"It said its name was Gollum."  
  
"Whatever Harry, lets go down to breakfast"  
  
"Do you think it could do with last night?"  
  
"Doubt it, when is Hermione ever wrong?" Turning even redder, he got up and flew downstairs  
  
Harry jumped into his school uniform and trailed after Ron looking earnestly for this creature Gollum.  
  
Harry and Ron entered the hall. It was surprisingly empty, the seats were usually occupied with a bustling crowd, hands everywhere grabbing food, this rang alarm bells in Harry, but Ron seemed not to notice.  
  
"Doesn't this seem a little bizarre? The hall is practically empty!"  
  
"Oh I didn't notice, can you see Hermione?"  
  
"Oh Hermione...I love you Hermione, I love you..."  
  
"Don't say a word Harry"  
  
Harry sped up to the spaces that surrounded Hermione; Ron bringing up the rear slumped down beside Harry. Before either of the boys had chance to speak, Hermione jumped in.  
  
"You never guess what was in my bedroom this morning! A small boy with curly hair, he was looking for a Gollum, whatever that was?"  
  
"I had Gollum on my bed looking for 'preciousssssssssssssssss'" HerH "Odd isn't it, we did that spell..." Hermione added wistfully  
  
"Hush; if anyone finds out we are as toasted as Umbridge's forehead when you correct her"  
  
"Okay" Hermione continued to whisper "Well isn't it a bit coincidental?  
  
"I was thinking that but Ron was asleep, we need to find..."  
  
Before Harry could finish an arrow was fired down the Gryffindor table at an alarming speed.  
  
"I think I got one!"  
  
As this was said a tall man raced down the table nimbly avoiding the plates of breakfast food. Leaping off and alongside another man they were inspecting a kill.  
  
"This is too weird Harry; we need to speak to Dumbledore." Ron rushed getting out of his seat  
  
"We can't, this is beyond anything we have done before."  
  
"If we can't speak to Dumbledore, let's talk to them, they might know."  
  
"Hermione, you are full of ideas, but if you have not realised, we have Potions next and I haven't done my homework...let's go!"  
  
And with that, the three of them chased down the two men that were conversing in the hall. 


	3. Rhyming Teachers

After an hour there was still no sign of them being in the school.  
  
"This is hopeless. They probably buggered off."  
  
"Ron, shh! Professor Snape is behind that door and I don't want to be caught skipping class." Hermione was desperate not to be caught; her reputation was something needing to be kept, clean.  
  
"He won't come out; he enjoys making our lives hell!"  
  
"Ron, shh!"  
  
Ron had his back to the door at this point and had not realised that he had indeed come out.  
  
"Ah! Three little Gryffindor's skipped class, what did their teacher say? Thirty points each were to be taken away! Detention too, I might as well add, for the three little Gryffindor's who were caught being bad!"  
  
Shocked into silence Hermione, Harry and Ron sidled away, edging their way back to the common room, making sure not to be caught by more rhyming teachers. Once they reached the common room they began to talk.  
  
"Snape now talks in rhyme? This day is getting stranger and stranger! Ron what do you think?" Harry called up to the boys' dorm where Ron was.  
  
"Uh Harry, I think you need to come up here"  
  
"What is it now?"  
  
Harry and Hermione followed Ron's worried voice to the boy's dorm.  
  
"He's back Harry, that Gollum thing is back, and he was in here."  
  
Scrawled on the wall in red was this:  
  
'The Ring has been lost, preciousssssssssssssssss, and we wants it'  
  
"Now can we talk to Dumbledore?"  
  
"No Harry, we have to talk to those men, especially that blonde one, he was gorgeous, oh, I mean he looked very intelligent."  
  
"Mmm okay" the boys chorused smiling. 


	4. I'm an Elf

"So where next?" Ron moaned.  
  
It had been almost two hours since they had last seen the strange men and before breakfast since Harry had seen Gollum. The three were stood in an empty corridor pondering about what was going on and how they were going to resolve it.  
  
"I think we may need to look at that spell again. It could be reversed" Harry asked sensitively.  
  
"Oh, but what if I can't? Hermione was trying to conceal what she really felt "I really think that speaking to them would help us greatly, don't you think?"  
  
"So where are they Hermione, where are they? Hmm? Where?"  
  
"RON, I DON'T KNOW" she screamed "I DON'T BLOODY KNOW."  
  
Harry and Ron stood as quiet as church mice, staring at this bright red girl that was shaking with anger. It was a shame really, as that rather good looking, rather tall and rather blonde man was perched behind her.  
  
"And another thing, you never appreciate my talents"  
  
"Hermione" Harry whispered.  
  
"Shut up Harry, I need to say this, you ignore me and then expect help with your homework that you never do, and one more thing..."  
  
"Hermione, look behind you" Ron gestured over her shoulder.  
  
"What?!"  
  
Behind her was still that rather good looking, rather tall and rather blonde man that she was quite fond of.  
  
"Oh, hi!" She chirped, fluttering her eyelashes a little as Ron and Harry rolled their eyes.  
  
"Do you know where Frodo and Sam are? The rather good looking, you get the picture.  
  
"Eh, we don't know any Frodo's or Sam's" Ron replied gruffly  
  
"Have you seen two hobbits, two hobbits?" A quite a bit shorter ginger man questioned hastily  
  
"They would only be children to your eyes" A darker, more concerned man said. "We are children, and no we haven't seen..."  
  
Hermione interjected Ron "I have, I have, he was in my room!"  
  
"Are you sure?" The blonde man's long hand rested on her shoulder.  
  
"Oh yes!"  
  
"You must take us there, we must find them"  
  
"Alright, but this could be a little easier if we knew your names."  
  
"I am Aragorn son of Arathorn, heir to the throne of Gondor"  
  
Ron sniggered.  
  
"Is there something funny with my name?"  
  
"Gondor, it sound like..."  
  
"Heard it all before" They spoke in unison.  
  
"I'm Legolas of the woodland realm."  
  
Hermione sighed heavily, with a loved up look in her eyes. Legolas quickly averted her gaze by standing just behind Aragorn.  
  
"I'm Gimli son of Gloin. Just don't mate, I have an axe."  
  
Sensing the amounting tension, Harry introduced himself and the others.  
  
"I'm Harry Potter, this is Ron Weasley and that is Hermione Granger."  
  
"Most pleased to meet you, can you take us to Frodo?"  
  
"My room, my room!"  
  
They all led the three men to the Gryffindor common room and then to the girls dorm.  
  
"He was down there." Hermione pointed to the gap between her bed and the window "He was whispering Gollum, Gollum."  
  
"Gollum!" Aragorn turned to Legolas and Gimli and began to communicate in another language, every so often talking in English to Gimli.  
  
"Do you want to see something about Gollum? He was in my room this morning."  
  
"Lead on Harry."  
  
"It's up there." Pointing up to where the scrawling was, he carried on "He was muttering about precious, and asking me for it."  
  
Aragorn was carefully searching the room for clues as he did in the girls' dorm. He was a quiet man, a thoughtful man who obviously cared very deeply about this Frodo.  
  
"So...where do you all come from and what was that language you were talking in?" Harry carefully asked.  
  
"Middle Earth."  
  
"You what?" Ron quipped.  
  
"Middle Earth. The language we were speaking in, that was Elvish."  
  
"I know elves."  
  
"Really?" Legolas answered excitedly.  
  
"His name is Dobby."  
  
"You know an elf called Dobby, are you sure it is an elf?" Legolas laughed.  
  
"Oh yes, he was this tall." Harry put his arm out and measured about three feet, "And look a bit like Gollum. Do you know any elves?"  
  
Aragorn and Gimli clearly knew something was about to happen and took several steps backwards with very anxious faces. Hermione and Ron sensing that something was amiss, did the same.  
  
"Oh no, that's not an elf, I'm an elf."  
  
"No, you can't be, elves are small creatures that look kinda ugly to be completely honest"  
  
"I'M AN ELF! See the pointy ears, I'M AN ELF. I'm not ugly, I'M AN ELF. I am oh-so-tall, I'M A BLOODY ELF!"  
  
Harry, so obviously dumbfounded slowly stepped backwards trying to find a safe place to hide.  
  
"Use your wand!" Ron hissed.  
  
Harry seized his wand and pointed it at Legolas, preparing to paralyse him.  
  
"Oh going to use your little magic wand, let me show you this" Legolas pulled out his quiver and set up an arrow. "Now you're scared aren't ya?"  
  
"Legolas stop it, he didn't know, maybe they have different elves here...you know a different species?" Aragorn tried.  
  
"I think you're right, I don't want to stress myself out again, and last time I got like this I had a spot for two hundred years!"  
  
"How old, are you?" Hermione practically cried.  
  
"Almost three thousand, 2,789 to be precise."  
  
"You can't be that old, I mean who could live for that long? You don't have the philosopher's stone, do you? Harry argued.  
  
"I'M AN ELF, elves live for thousands of year, and we are immortal. The most beautiful creatures on earth, don't mess with me okay!" 


	5. The Hunters

"Just pass that to me and we are finished, let's show Draco what Weasley means!"  
  
Through the cracks in the Slytherin wall, the two Weasley boys and their companions could plainly see and hear what the group of Slytherin's were talking about.  
  
"Second hand clothes? Who wears second hand clothes to school? I wouldn't even wear them to do cleaning, as if I would ever do cleaning!" The speaker stood up, his electric blonde hair glinting immorally in the cold sun. His group looked up to him, elders as well, as if he owned them.  
  
"So who wears second hand clothes?" The group then chorused "The Weasley's!"  
  
"That's it. Come on you three; let's show him what it's like to wear second hand clothes..."  
  
With that, a huge explosion went off, a blast of smoke and several fireworks  
  
"Ahh!" A girly scream was heard, and it wasn't Draco...  
  
"Pippin, shh!" His counterpart whispered, "You haven't have you?"  
  
"No! Dry as a whistle Merry."  
  
Merry and Pippin gazed up to George and Fred to hear their wisdom.  
  
"Take a peek, this is revenge!"  
  
Draco was dressed head to toe in women's clothing, and to be more precise, Dolores Umbridge's clothes. Giggles were kept behind clamped hands both sides of the wall.  
  
"Who did this?" Draco shrilled, "When I find out, my father will deal with you all!"  
  
"Sorry Draco." A few voices mumbled. Crabbe and Goyle's were more predominant, though not all together more serious.  
  
"Fred, you two are after our own hearts! You are truly worthy of the Shire!"  
  
"Shire?" George echoed.  
  
"That's where we are from."  
  
Fred and George exchanged puzzled looks.  
  
"Well you are rather small."  
  
"What was that noise?" Hermione questioned  
  
"An explosion, by my guess, maybe Saruman is playing an evil hand in this foray." Aragorn answered.  
  
"Where do you think it came from?" Legolas asked.  
  
"I reckon over by the Slytherin's."  
  
Ron led the pack to where he thought is come from; unfortunately they were the other side of the school.  
  
"What are you Gimli?" Harry puffed  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Legolas is an elf; I presume Aragorn is a man."  
  
"I'm a dwarf; you don't know any dwarfs do you?"  
  
"No."  
  
Ron stopped just before the Slytherin common room entrance.  
  
"This is it." Ron pointed to the painting, "The painting is moving, they are coming out! Hide!"  
  
Harry and Hermione ran back around the corner, Ron followed suit. Hermione, duh! Legolas, Aragorn and Gimli had no idea what the hell was going on so they just stood still.  
  
"Legolas stop nancing about, you are making it obvious."  
  
"Making what obvious?"  
  
"IT!"  
  
Legolas pouted and boy he could he pout! I always feel like saying 'a parrot could perch on that'. I don't though; he is so...so...intelligent  
  
"Who are you?" Draco enquired.  
  
"I'm Aragorn, this is Gimli..."  
  
"Who is this?"  
  
"I'm Legolas."  
  
"Are you new here? You know if you make the right friends..."  
  
"You mean you want to be my friend! That is so nice, Aragorn, people here are so nice aren't they?"  
  
"Mmm, I suppose..."  
  
Aragorn was clearly not happy with the situation, actually he was far from it and Gimli could tell.  
  
"So young man." A gruff voice sounded, "What is with the ladies clothing, can you not find your own?"  
  
"I don't know how or why I am dressed like this."  
  
"I don't ever dress in ladies clothing and Aragorn always says I nance about the place, people here are nice and weird." 


End file.
